To match or not: Easy to navigate while swiping.

Rom-com writer Annabelle Slator wasn’t expecting to see a photo of her dead dog when she swiped on a dating app, but there’s a time for everything. But it wasn’t just Pooch who was adopted. First, she was taking a picture, and the subject was her ex-boyfriend, a believer who she recently stumbled upon.

“He had a picture with my dog ​​(who had died) that I took his profile!” Slator tells Mashable.

“I was really shocked that Audacity is doing a profile on a dating app so I worked literally but also using photos from my weekend with my family dog!!!” he adds. “I’ve been matched with him, I explained to him, please stop using pictures of my dead dog to be posted, ‘n’t posted immediately Lmao.”

“Please stop using pictures of my dead dog for placement.”

Slator’s Ex managed to get a quick apology before blocking him. She says: “He gave me the word ‘I’m sorry you’re doing well,'” she said. In his book Commencement Date, Slator included this anecdote as “like an evergreen f*ck you.”

Seeing an ex on a dating app is an occupational hazard, unfortunately. The logical move when you see a past love is to slide past it and pretend you didn’t see them. Leaving the past behind you. But, life is not always like that. Sometimes, we like to get dirty, we swipe to the left of the front because life is too short and, well, it’s still hot.

The complex emotions of seeing awards on a dating app

In Slator’s case, she aligned with Ex to give him a piece of her mind, but others told me they connected because they were curious about the possibility. A few people have told me that they left the hell out of their ex and pretended they wouldn’t see them.

It can bring up complex emotions when you come face to face with your past. Lucie, who wishes to use a pseudonym for privacy reasons, saw her ex-husband on a dating app and felt “horribly irrational and angry.”

“She’s apparently ’emotionally available now,'” Jokes. “The old saying about how women spend all their time working on a man, only to spend all their hard work grooming the next woman – is true!”

Lucie tells me she spent 20 years driving her ex. “After that we divorced and he learned to drive, bought a car, got an apartment, and cooked. I did everything before.” Her Ex now has a New Companion and Lucie notices a marked difference in his behavior. “Now he chooses his new girlfriend and is treated like a queen! I put up with being his mother/wife for decades and he is so annoying.”

“Sure, maybe now he’s spiritually available – but only because I told him to go to therapy!”

For some people, however, the past doesn’t always stay in the past.

Rekindling an old flame

Take Chloe’s experience: She was matched with her University Ex-Ex-exway boyfriend. “We continued for a while, we slept together. I wanted to be friends, he ended up wanting more, which is confusing,” he tells me.

Chloe and her Ex had been on and off ever since they broke up at university, so when he left a funny comment on one of her pictures on Hinge, she decided to match him in a relationship like we broke up at Uni. “

“It was a very strong reconnection,” Chloe said. “This was released in the spring/summer of hanging with that kind of lift for us at the end it wanted something different from it.” The two still communicate, but it’s not the same. Chloe is in a new relationship now. “It makes me sad but I know I have to accept it, it’s not right for him or my partner to be close in any way.”

Chloe has no regrets about her decision to renew. “It was good to kind of get back to being my own person,” he adds.

Not everyone is very close with their Ex. In the dating app, Nina checked the previous situation to see who was ending, so it’s like seeing what will happen. He says: “He even used a photo I took of him for his profile. Nina’s curiosity finally led to confirmation that this was the same. She found “radio silence” despite the similarity.

So, should we comply with the exit of curiosity, just “this story,” or be confused? Experts advise (scary I know!).

Is it a bad idea to match with an ex?

Zachary Zapha, an expert on sexuality and relationships, says: “If you’re in a swipe-based program, swipe left. For the love of God, don’t see if they’re doing it! ‘ Downgrade! ”

“If, for some reason, they reach out to you on the app, feel free to respond, ‘Wow, I’m still hurt and not in a place where we can talk right then, but I’ll find out if anything changes,'” Zane advises. “It’s reliable, up to date, and hopefully it should discourage them from reaching further. Limits are important!”

What should you do if you see your ex has offended you? “If seeing your ex’s profile on a dating app triggers your nervousness and sends you into a loop/frenzy, then don’t freakin’ do it. “What if they saw you and saw you and realized you blocked them? Who cares who cares!

Marsh Goei, senior dating manager at Dating App Breeze says seeing a past love on the app can make the dating world feel smaller, but it’s often more than we see. “First of all, don’t be afraid. It happens to many of us, and while it can evoke uncomfortable feelings, remember: swipe, swipe there, or start a conversation.”

Give yourself permission to go back, Goei adds. Close the app, throw your phone on the couch, and walk away. If it still bothers you, talk to a friend. “They may have experienced the same thing, whether they saw an ex on an app, on a date, or on social media. Sharing these feelings with someone who understands you,” Goei said.

If it makes you feel better, I’ve seen good exits from all apps. I’ve had bad rides without bad, though two endes personally to Same pub you have Same night. It was a lot. Yes, I went home and threw up. What else can you do in that situation?

Anyway! Finally, what do you do when you are faced with an ex who is completely over you. If you have good goals and feel like there is a never-ending business, this is your call. But if this is a person who hurt you, caused you emotional pain, treated you badly, curiosity can just kill the cat. So swipe past and don’t give it another thought.