I told my doctor would I live in a weakened pain for seven years. His response to two words was the last grass.

Author and his children in 2016.

How much is the biggest pain to carry? Where do you draw a line? I wondered these questions as I sat on the cold test table in my OB-GYN office in the last June.

I used to have moments of the moon. They had done the worst of my 20s and became XCRuciatites on my 30s. And when I hit Perimenopause a few years ago, I began to find those decading moments twice a month.

On that day in June, I explained my doctor to look for it almost every month and my pain. Advil and the underlined narcotics did not suffer pain. I was gone and slept in bed in two days a month for four. I have become very depressed. What would this be like my life?

I reminded my doctor that because I had a family history of Uterine and Heaven, I thought it’s best to see him, as things hear “.” He seemed … annoyed. And soon, he always stayed like that.

You have spent two minutes on the ultrasound my cervix and then said, “Everything looks good!”

I said: “But I am very low my metallic iron. I am in many pain. This is impossible to be normal.”

He became frustrated and said, “Take a lack of shortage.”

Then he added the two unpleasant words, and he did so much in emercy, and do not make it so much that he is the last grass: “Times hurt!”

Took everything to me that it would not be done he It was injured in that moment. He didn’t know what I was doing, how much time I was. I wanted to shout and swear, tell her to stumble after the moment, let her get their age. But because of all the lives of circumstances, I was silent. I was polite, yes.

At that time, I was used to be taken seriously. I had enough doctor in my life, until it had returned when a child doctor told me to be seven years old and I think my hives could not feel anxious. It turned out that it was a fifth disease.

This was not the first time that the OB-GYN dismissed me. In the past seven years, by each designation, I said my cramps so bad that I couldn’t walk, that no tree reduced the bad grief. It was very bad each year.

And I believed Him when He told him, so all the visit, that just was at the kometriosis or plamenopause. I believed my doctor because I (foolly) trust his authority. I believed him because suffering is evident (Maybe I have a lower limit of pain?). I believed her because I didn’t know how to support you.

Later I found that I was not alone to hear mysterious and sound: 2024 survey “revealed that more than 80% of women have spent their pain. The third part of women who had been examined said that their mental health suffered as a result. The colors of colors have the worst, and they find the worst of them all.

Beeper my doctor cried. “I have to get to the hospital to bring a baby.”

In the meantime, I was enough. When I was at home, instead of regret, I quickly researched women who especially worked for women’s health, especially after years.

Two days later, I was in my new doctor’s office, a woman with silver in her 50 years, taking my family’s history.

It is not surprising that he is in so much pain, “he said, confirming the past seven years to me.

Women’s pain has been taken much larger than men. The New England Journal of Medicine found that women were seven times to be false and excluded from heart attacks. Why? Because medical concepts of the diseases are based on the understanding of male body, and women have different symptoms than men when they are attacked by a heart attack. Women should also wait a long time to be seen by health care professionals, finding pain medicines, and they may be told that their pains are pains.

After my new doctor wrote my polyss – in the old place full of awesome gynecological processes, that was very bad – we found that they had Benign. He stayed with me and asked: “With your family history, and your lasting pain, do you consider hysterectomy?”

Although no other doctor who raised this from me, I had chosen it. Some women in my family – Mother, my cousins ​​- have had hyrics in their 40s. One of my uncles died at the age of 49 only after the war with Uterine cancer and ovari. My womb and Ovaries felt like a note time: How did I expect? My years of childbearing had passed. My two daughters are new now. I want me to live so I can raise myself.

In the next few weeks, I have received a second opinion: My faithful doctor who was faithful, admitted the best way to go forward. If the insurance agreed they would cover, I planned my surgery. The date was laid at the beginning of August with a small laparoscopic removal of my Ovaroscopic and the uterus.

My last day with reprehensing was emotional. Even if they had created despair, they too were responsible for my daughters, the greatest happiness in my life. It took three cycle of IVF and 99 eggs released on my ovari to find our two bright, intelligent, humorous, humorous.

I looked at 6 am of surgery. I ended up having a group of women all over, nurses and doctors who thought about all: They gave me a few medications before they were “preparing for painful receptors.”

“This will make your rescue very painful,” said one of the nurses when he beats a warm cloth over me. The team took their time, answering all the questions I had and followed. I felt created with their care, kindness, and respect. Compared to my former times, Dr. “It was injured!” – This was refreshing.

Before I went under anesthesia, I thought that my beautiful father had died two years ago. I thought, when we had children, after our children, or I would tell him against the war or argument at school, he said: “Continue:” On. “He could let us go out, and encourage us to breathe deep and leave evil in the background.

I never stayed at the hospital overnight. I was easily healed as I entered a temporary hell surgery. Similar doctors have led me gently with the best kind of treatment of Hormone Replacement for treating my first light, migraines and brain fog.

Now, I’m very happy than ever. My pain altogether. It wasn’t only any pain I realized my suffering, and for how long.

With no pain of pain, I have a whole new attitude of happiness and the presence of the moment, and I feel the true sense of ownership in my body. I just wish for the habitual age age. And I wish I had fired my OB for the first time I didn’t wash what I saw.

I can tell my daughters, sister, a great friend, any woman, finding a doctor is free to talk to her, and who listen to you. If you feel fired or respected, ask yourself: Have they treated me this if I were a person? Find a doctor who believes women. It can be heard, but not: My pain burned and were ignored by my doctor for years.

This previous year was a wake up. In the world where women’s pain is worse than men, and the careful hatred of women and health care, I have decided to prioritize my health from here. I will never decrease. You do not have to live in pain, and there is nothing good for the peaceful suffering. Life is too short.

Now, as my dad would say, It’s on.

Carrie Friedman lives in southern California and his family and published during New York Times, Los Angeles and Washington Post, among others. His website iswwwwwwww.

This article was originally appeared in Huffpost in September 2025.

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